The Wienery

Breakfast ALL DAY. Get it?

Drive-In Dog w/Slaw

On The Road...MPLS
Nestled in the heart of the West Bank section of Minneapolis is the Wienery, a small eatery that packs a lot of flavor and flair. The setup is about 4-5 tables and chairs plus another 10-12 seats at a bar. Breakfast is served ALL day. I emphasize that because there were enough signs mentioning it and people still asked. Reading is not fundamental, it's overrated.

The food, yes, the food. The dogs were Vienna Beef and that's an automatic 4-stars because them doggies run the Midwest. I went dogs only on this trip because I was anticipating more eating (turned out to be Matt's and that delicious Jucy Lucy) and the doggies did not disappoint.

Decision time and it was not easy. Their menu runs deep, much like my appetite but not like my wallet so I had to make some tough choices. I opted for the Tasmanian Devil because I wanted the hottest of the hot chili on top of my doggy and then I went for more chili and some slaw on the Drive-In Dog, a nod to my days in Charleston.

Both hit the spot perfectly and someone please tell me why it's so hard to find a poppy seeded hot dog roll here in NYC? I mean, this is NYC! Let's get on the ball. It's for the children, just ask this guy.


Rating - 5/5. I had perfection at the Wienery. Them doggies were so good and the chili was amazing, nice and spicy and that slaw. WOW! I loved the slaw. I loved it so much I would have let them make a beard of slaw on my face to pick it while riding the light rail back to the airport. That would have been fun to explain to the TSA folks.

Their site - www.wienery.com

**If you want to make some slaw at home the way the Wienery does out in MPLS, have a look here for the recipe!

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Grinders West

Large Marge - Look at those grill marks

On The Road...KCMO
To those who have followed me from the beginnings on gothamBURGERS and gothamPIZZA, thank you. Thank you for continuing on this journey, or should I say progression to 5BFG. That said, my most recent road trip took me to Kansas City, Missouri for some Yankees' baseball and good food. While I did get my Yankees baseball, good food became a bit more of a challenge than hitting Mariano Rivera's cutter.

My KC research started with a web search for "best burgers KC" and then "best pizza KC" just for the heck of it. Ironically, one place showed up on both and immediately, Grinders was vaulted to the top of my hit list. Killing two birds with one stone, especially in foreign territory is a blessing. As it was, Grinders was the first, and perhaps, best meal I'd have out there (more on that later).

The interior had flava. I really liked the decor and the hand crafted tables were really cool and fun to look at. **Note the tables are done by local artists and are for sale at the restaurant. Back to why you're here, the food! I knew I wanted a burger and since they had one called "Large Marge" that one my approval. As a Simpsons fan, a burger bearing the name of the matriarch of the cartoon clan was worth a try. Marge, of course, delivered! Thick, juicy, full of flavor, cooked to order.

Bengal Tiger

The other reason for Grinders was the pizza and I was encouraged by the waitress to try the Bengal Tiger - a slice with Tandoori Chicken. Ironically, this was the one slice I singled out as not wanting since I am not the biggest fan of Indian food and, well, I wish I would have stuck to my guns. I actually enjoyed the pizza, not much thicker than a tortilla and everything was fresh. I just wish I sampled a different slice.

Fortunately, I was steered in the direction of the Reuben sandwich, which was "to die for." And this is how I rounded out my meal and was glad to get the taste of tandoori out of my mouth.

Burger Rating - 4.5/5 - just about as good as a burger can get! Nice and fresh. Delicious. Perfectly sized bun. Not a deep burger menu.

Pizza Rating - 3.5/5 - Lots of options here. Not like your momma's pizza but a lot of interesting options that merit a look and probably a second look. If I was rating just the piece I had, considering I knew I would not like it, I'd still give it a 2.5 but I am bumping it up because there was definitely something good there just needed a different "flavor" to satisfy my pizza cravings.

Their site - http://grinderspizza.com/index.php?/grinderswest/

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Matt's Bar

Matt's Bar - Exterior Sign

On the road..Minneapolis, MN (aka MPLS)
Today we're on the road in MPLS - home of the Twins, Vikings, Atmosphere, Target, the T'Wolves, TARGET, the Mall of America, Fifth Element, and most importantly the Jucy Lucy. Ironically, while I did see the homes of the Twins, Vikings, and T'wolves plus the Mall of America during my recent jaunt to the Twin Cities, I did not see one Target. Disbelief aside, my mission was food and it was mission accomplished. Oh and there's an NHL team called the Wild that calls MPLS home too.

Traveling up and down the light rail brought me to a number of places I absolutely had to try but the one place I enjoyed the most was actually an accident. I knew of the "Jucy Lucy" prior to my arrival in the Twin Cities however, I did not know just where I wanted to get one. That, my friends, is where fate comes in. I was waiting for the 22 bus and I was just chattin' it up with the bus driver. Destination - unknown. Fortunately, his route took me to Matt's Bar and at his urging, and the urging of another passenger, Matt's was a can't miss. Can't miss means must do so I did it and WOW! For followers of my tumblr you have seen the pics posted from Matt's, featuring the Jucy Lucy I enjoyed there. What I have for those who do not know is video of my Jucy Lucy Experience, behold:

Legend has it that a customer didn't want a run in the mill burger or cheeseburger so he had them form two patties and stuff cheese in the middle. The Jucy Lucy was born and it's been a hit ever since. Having this still of burger is a must in the Midwest. Visiting Matt's, where the burger was born just takes the experience to another level. Mine was enjoyed with some chopped onion and a pickle and I wish I was there right now to have another, and another, and maybe one more for the road.

As I was eating this and the cheesy goodness burned my hand, I could not help but wonder if Slug of Atmosphere was referring to this Lucy on their hit F&%K You Lucy because I know it was on my mind...


Rating - 5/5 - concept, nostalgia, and freshly cooked deliciousness. 

Their site - http://www.mattsbar.com/

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Size Does Matter

It's fair to say that nobody uses a scale to actually measure the size of burgers, specifically the three shown here. After all, the only place where they will adamantly measure out your food and perhaps give you less than you are entitled to get is Subway, the WORST SANDWICH PLACE ANYWHERE, EVER! Ask for more meat and you may as well be asking to slaughter their first born.

A quick comparison for my local burger quests will show the 5, 6, and 7 oz burgers.

5oz - No.9 Burger - Jimmy's Burger Shack

And now for a 6oz burger from Lee's Burgers, located in Newton Centre, MA.

6oz Sirloin Burger - Lee's Burgers - Newton, MA

And here is that 7oz gem from the great Jackson Hole...

7oz Southwest Burger - Jackson Hole

Again, I didn't measure anything. I don't really care to measure anything. And for all I know, 1oz of beef may make that much of a difference but I have my doubts. Somewhere along the way I think Jackson Hole lost their scale or their just pulling our leg with that "Home of the 7oz Burger Talk." Don't worry though, I aint mad at ya, neither is this guy

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St. Marks 2 Bros Pizza

St. Marks 2 Bros Sign

Chances are you've seen a St. Mark's 2 Bros somewhere in the city. You may have even looked at it with a skeptical eye because, after all, they sell pizza for a dollar a piece. Everywhere else charges at least $2.25 and as you know, there's a lot of misses in the city and not as many hits. So I was out by Port Authority one evening and I said, "DJ, it's time to give the dollar store pizza a shot." I mean, how bad could it be? And would I really regret wasting a dollar if it was that bad? 

I must say, the place is clean, crowded and the lines are moving. This place was humming and they sell one of the better slices in all of NYC. The size, the flavor, the price all lead to St. Marks being a must try. Admit it, you love the fast food spots that have the dollar menu because you love the dollar menu. You might venture into the dollar store because you love a bargain. If you eat here it's because you just want good pizza at a GREAT price. This is everything good about your neighborhood pizzeria, minus the red drink.

St Marks - That's a nice slice!

Rating - 4.25/5 - an extra .25 because of the amazing price!

**Note - this review was based on my recent experience at the St. Mark's 2 Bros on 9th Ave. If you are walking down 9th from Uptown, do NOT go to the dump that sells 99 cent pizza. That place will not give you your penny back and they serve absolute garbage.

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Jimmy's Burger Shack

Hard to believe there's more mini than 5oz

Love Potion #9. Or something

Home sweet home! Back in the city so nice they named it twice after a whirlwind trip that brought me all over the middle of this great country. After stepping off the MEGA BUS and before boarding the not-so-mega-train, I ventured to Jimmy's Burger Shack for some, wait for it....wait some more....you guessed it!! BURGERS! Desperate times call for desperate measures and I was putting my burger craving in the hand of Brother Jimmy in the hopes that he could satisfy my needs. Did Jimmy deliver? Did DJ get his burger craving satisfied on the corner of 8th and 32nd? Stay tuned to find out!

And we're back!! So I stroll into the Shack only to immediately be disappointed, why? Well, it appeared as if there was chaos all around in there and the cook just didn't look like he was feeling it that day. Maybe he wanted to see some preseason football? Maybe he had to catch up on his DVR episodes of Judge Judy? Maybe he just can't cook burgers? Well, I order the No 9 (5oz w/bacon and a fried egg) and I waited. And waited. And waited. Somewhere in that waiting was my realization that there was no way that my teeny tiny burger was going to show up rare. Or medium rare. Or medium. Or medium well. Or well done. It was just done. Hockey puck done which I guess is appropriate considering their proximity to MSG, the World's Most Famous Arena.

Hi. I'm #9

To the left is my lil' puck covered with a perfectly fried egg and perfectly cooked bacon (FOR ME PEOPLE! Maybe you want your bacon crunchy by for me this is perfect, k?) Anyway, this lil guy was like the most delicious bacon and egg sandwich (on a mini potato roll) marred by a ultra well done burger that lacked any flavor. Well, not any flavor. It had the flavor of overcooked, which I am certain is on the spectrum somewhere.

No9 - REALLY DONE

As your gracious host, I never stop at just one and I gave a mini a shot and well, the results were quite similar. Over done, no taste other than the lettuce and tomato, oh and bread. Can't forget that. Nor can I forget the Shack Sauce. All those little helpers tried to drown out the taste of overdone and all some type of flavor to the poor lil guy. I think the saying was help for the helpless as the end result was mediocre at best.

I was entertained by this couple engaged in a fight that was LONG overdue. And it was nice to be begged for money by NY hobos since I was tired of the beggars in KC or MPLS or Boston.

Rating - 1.5/5 - Concept is the only thing that scores points. Some cooking tips for anyone making a slider, it's small and takes a lot less time to cook. You do not need to cover it on the grill. Bad idea. Bad, bad idea.

Their site - http://www.jimmysburgershack.com/ (under construction as of 8/26, hopefully site design comes with burger making lessons)


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Famous Amadeus Pizza

Famous Amadeus Pizza

Followers of my other blog Gothamburgers know of my recent run-in at Jimmy's Burger Shack. While I left Jimmy's full of sorrow, I made a left onto 8th avenue where someone famous was calling. That someone was Sean Combs. Are you doubting me Thomas? Well, go to Famous Amadeus Pizzeria on 8th Ave. and tell me that Mr. Combs' picture is not on the wall, calling you.

Interestingly, I was a bit confused by the name. Maybe it was Famous Amos but that was taken by that cookie guy? Or maybe it's just meant to be Amadeus? I hear the name Amadeus and Falco comes to mind. Falco and this guy.

Famous Amadeus Slice

In my undying quest to eat at every pizzeria in NYC, I ventured into Amadeus, not expecting much but knowing it was light years ahead of the competition across the street. Armed with a few bucks and low expectations, I gave Famous Amadeus a shot. How was it? Well, it was actually good. The sauce was tasty and had nice layers of flavor to it. The bottom had a nice crunch and the crust was good. My only issue was the copious amounts of cheese on the plain slice.

Rating - 3.25/5 - It's a bit pricy at $2.75 per for a plain but overall it's good, even with all that cheese. It's definitely better than that other place across the street so if you need pizza after a night at the garden, give Amadeus a shot. Be sure to ask the guy behind the counter to, "Rock me Amadeus."

Their site - http://www.famousamadeus.com/Welcome.tpl

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Grimaldi's

Grimaldi's Pizzeria - Exterior

People like me call it downtown Brooklyn. Fancy people may call it Brooklyn Heights or whatever the heck else they call these areas downtown. Personally, I don't care what you call it. Get anywhere near the Brooklyn Bridge, start sniffing for pizza and follow the scent. If you find an enormous line near a velvet rope, you've come to the right place.

"Nothing is worth that kind of wait." That's what the ignorant will say without ever having taken a bite of the coal fired awesomeness that is Grimaldi's pizza. Thin, fresh, delicious. There's not much else like this in all of NYC and let me tell you, there's a reason the big G ranks at or near the very top of all the "Best Pizza" lists for the 5 Boroughs.

Grimaldi's Pizzera - You know the rules

Loyal followers know that I am not fond of the pretentious "No slices" places, see Chipp, however there are pizzerias where this works. How? Well, for starters they have the rep to back it up. Secondly, the pizza is that good that you should want a minimum of 8 pieces so that even if you don't gorge you can gladly enjoy them later. Re-heated, not cold, of course.

Call it what you will but I go here for their signature pie with no toppings to litter the taste of the amazing sauce (light, sweet, and full of flavor), fresh mozzarella (this is mmm, mmmm good), and basil. The thin crust, coal fired masterpiece is served fast and HOT as their pizza man churns out pie after pie in record time to serve the masses.


Rating - 5/5 - This is the best of the best. I hear that eating this will make you look younger, act smarter, live forever, and give you cool points with even the most harsh critics. Remember the girl that would NEVER go to prom with you? Should have told her you eat here regularly and she'd have been convinced that you're not the loser she thought you to be.

Their site - Grimaldi's

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Jackson Hole

Jackson Hole - Columbus Ave

"Home of the 7oz. Burger." This must be some kind of joke because the burger at the Hole is massive. I'm not sure how many ounces it is in total (pre, nor post cooked weight) however it feels and eats a lot larger than lucky number seven - not to be confused with this classic film.

Jackson Hole is like a burger aficionado's dream come true in the sense that there's a wide variety of toppings and fun names for their burgers. I'm a burger aficionado! Must explain my affinity for this place. The burgers are fresh, never frozen, and served in giant hand-formed patties that are slightly larger for their undersized bun. More on that in a minute.

Jackson Hole - Southwest Burger

I've ventured to JH on several occasions and am always surprised at the size of the burger and I have to admit, I laugh because the big guy usually falls apart and I need to use my fork to finish it. Even at medium rare, this thing has a hard time staying together (at least you know the meat's fresh and not a frozen piece of junk).

Jackson Hole - Burger Breakage

The meat, however, lacks any discernible flavor. It just tastes like meat. The toppings, on the other hand, usually just add to the fun and make a nice party in your mouth. My most recent visit, for this review, features the Southwest Burger - topped with fresh guacamole and raw onion. Two words, simply delicioso - not to be confused with Miss Ingrid, but she can join me for burgers any day.

Look at the size of that thing! 7 oz?!?!? I think not but I LOVE IT! I've had a number of their mega-sized burgers and have always enjoyed them. Even when they break apart like the picture shows at right. Don't be fooled though, this will not disappoint! You may want to go with medium but that's against my religion.

Rating - 4/5 - Size and variety reign supreme. I'd love to see some different bun offering but this does the job.

Their site - www.jacksonholeburgers.com

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Luigi's (8th Ave)

Luigi's 8th Ave

Another day, another Luigi's. There are literally a million pizzerias in NYC and I seem to keep stumbling upon new ones named after the Nintendo icon's not-so-famous other brother. In honor of the death of Luigi's on West End and 61st is another Luigi's for you.

The sign says they've been there since 1975. That's somewhat impressive because that's totally like forever ago, it's older than me, and there's another pizzeria that's like 3 doors down (no not the rock n roll band, literally three doors away) so it must be good. MUST BE!

Or not. I mean, when you live my life you gotta eat pizza and you gotta eat pizza from places named Luigi's. You just gotta. Or I gotta. Whatever. Don't confuse me here. So I go to this Luigi's, basking in my accomplishments in the deaths of WSBS and the aforementioned West End Luigi's. Before you go all soft on me, just remember that saving the world from bad food is part of my super-hero code of ethics.

Luigi's Slice - 8th Ave

Luigi's Slice - 8th Ave - Floppy

Back to the slice at hand....well, it's $2.50 for a plain which is essentially the de-facto price in NYC (unless you go to 2 Bros. Pizza and we're going there soon kids!) and it's a big enough slice to justify something or other with the price point. However, the slice must deliver. Does it? Size does matter so it gets a point there. That's a heck of a lot of cheese. Did I order extra cheese? I didn't think so but whatever, Trevor. I'm hungry and ready to eat. First bite, not bad. Not much flavor at all, but not awful. Trust me I know awful. But, this Luigi does not deliver and what's the nail in the coffin? Look at that flop. I haven't seen a flop like that since I won that hold 'em tourney at the Trop last summer. Oy vey Luigi. You have not rescued the Princess with this one.

Rating - 1.5/5 - Size matters so that's all the points you get. Flavorless and floppy are the F words I'll use since I keep this PG.

Their site - http://www.luigispizzanyc.com/ 

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Croxley Ales - Redux

It's rare (no pun intended) that I'll go back to a burger joint and do another review but on occasion there's something that merits not just a revisit, but actually a whole new review. Heck, if I did a review for all my Stand visits you'd think I was stalking someone there. But, the newest review is actually a revisit to Croxley Ales, one week later.

What would warrant such a thing? Simple, the Mac Daddy offered by Croxley Ales. The menu describes the Mac Daddy as "our 1/2 lb burger topped with Mac n Cheese." Now Mac n Cheese can swing a number of different ways and as the review of the now dead WSBS proves that it needn't even have Mac to be Mac n Cheese. Such blatant false advertising should be illegal but in the end, the WSBS paid the piper and is not serving up burgers anymore.

Croxley Ales - Mac Daddy Burger

So, my burning question was, "will this thing even have macaroni?" Which was followed up with,"I wonder if it'll be boxed Mac n Cheese?" Well the moment of truth arrived and behold, in all its splendor, the Mac Daddy.

Let's start with the positives, semi toasted roll = YUM! Burger = cooked perfectly. Mac n Cheese = definitely homemade, definitely delicious, and kudos to whomever choose orecchiette as the Mac. WOW! Sweet potato fries on the side was a nice touch.

The negatives? Well, I'm not sure why there was lettuce, tomato, or onion on there. I ate them all separately and called it my salad - I needed something resembling healthy food since I wolfed down about 30 hot wings plus this monster.

The other negative, the burger and mac n cheese seemed disjointed. They just didn't seem to want to play with one another. I LOVED the mac n cheese. I can't stress that enough. I'd eat that any day of the week and put it up as a stand alone against anything S'mac serves and Croxley will be the winner. But this was not the right fit for the burger. I needed something more cheddar-y and less alfredo-y to deliver here. Would I do this again? I'm not sure. But I do suggest you try it because it's quite a delicious experience all for only $12.95.

Rating - 3.75/5 - the idea is flawless. The execution only slightly flawed. It's big and it's tasty and it's worth a look but there's still room for a true Mac N Cheese burger out there and I'm still on the hunt to see if anyone else can deliver.

Their site - www.croxley.com

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Croxley Ales

Croxley Ales Front

What started as a quest for a SICK wing special ended up being a quest for an even SICKER burger. For those not in the know, Croxley Ales on Ave. B (near 3rd) is the home of the 10 cent wings (Mon-Wed). I arrived as a skeptic for a couple of reasons - 1) that's too good to be true 2) the wings must be as tiny as popcorn chicken 3) there's gotta be a catch, there's ALWAYS a catch. Much to my surprise, this was not too good to be true, the chicken wings were big, not Dallas BBQ BIG but still a big wing, and there is no catch. Well, not really. If you consider buying a minimum of 15 wings a catch, well then they got you! Buy 15 and spend a buck fifty or ELSE! The wings alone are worth the voyage. Heck, the wings are worth more than they're charging but I am NEVER going to complain about wanting to pay more for something. Great wings at an even better price and the place is loaded with TVs to watch the game, TMZ, Golden Girls, whatevs.

But you're saying, what about this burger you speak of. Welllllll kids, lemme tell you about this burger known as "The What The S*?!" burger which is your typical 8oz burger with lettuce, tomato, and onion.

You say, "What's the big deal DJ?"
I say, "There's no bun!" 
You say, "Carb conscious all of the sudden?"
I say, "Nope, who needs a bun when you can put this burger between not 1, but 2 grilled cheese sandwiches?"
You say, "I wish I was your cardiologist b/c your heart's gotta blow sooner, not later."
I just laugh in your face.

Croxley Wings!

Now there are a number of other wild concoctions on the burger front and I promise to do more burgers and less wings next time so that I can maybe tame a pair of wild beasts (the Triple Threat - topped w/bacon, cheddar, pulled pork and the Mac Daddy - topped w/Mac N Cheese come to mind). The waitress was kinda rooting against me finishing my burger, said she's only seen 1 person do it and eat all the fries. I told her I don't eat fries and she rolled her eyes. My boy stands up and says "dude at 15 wings" she seemed apathetic. I'll show her. One day she'll be proud of me.

The What the Burger!

On the real though, the burger is kinda flavorless. Maybe it was flavor overload? Maybe I was in a state of delirium with all the chickens and grilled cheesy goodness running through my system. But if I use some ketchup, the burger definitely needed some help when there was no more lettuce, tomato, or onion to save it. Sorry Louis, I didn't mean to do it!

Rating - 4/5 - this is a big burger, needs some flavor. Meat was fresh, not frozen. Cooked to perfection so I can't complain. But with all the options, I feel like I'm rating one and Croxley deserves a better fate because the burgers are stand out and the wings are spectacular!

Their site - www.croxley.com

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Broadway Pizza

Broadway Pizza - 99th and B'way

Broadway Pizza - Good Size

My most recent eatercising adventure included a 3 mile jaunt with 5 stops along the way. One of the five was Broadway Pizza, conveniently located on Broadway and 99th. The medium sized pizzeria features entrees and sandwiches as well but we all know why I was there. The competition is plentiful, but not so fierce when venturing up and down Broadway from Lincoln Center to say 110th but you need to know where to spend your pizza eating dollars.

The slice offered at Broadway Pizza is good size and is comparably priced to the rest of the joints on B'way (Sal & Carmine's, Cafe Viva, Cheesy Pizza, Two Boots, etc.) The difference here is that Broadway Pizza may in face have the best slice of them all. The plan, cheese slice had really good sauce and the perfect sauce:cheese ratio, thin crust, nice crunch.

Of all the pizza I've had in this area, Broadway Pizza has the best tasting slice, not the biggest since Sal & Carmine's takes that honor, but the slice at Broadway resembled pizza, all the way through as opposed to that slop I got at S&C. More importantly, it tasted good. The sauce really jumped out at me here and I enjoyed the slice as I strolled down B'way to my next destination...

Rating - 3.5/5 - Nothing overwhelming here. A good slice at a decent price. $2.50 seems to be the going rate around most of Manhattan but I'll soon show you how we buck that trend to get an absolutely DELICIOUS slice (along with one that is not so delicious so buyer beware and stay tuned)!

Their site - www.broadwaypizza2go.com

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Chipp

Ever notice the rash of pizzerias that are so self-important that they dare not serve you a slice of pizza. Some have earned that degree of status (Lombardi's and Grimaldi's come to mind and they often exchange the top slot for the best pizzeria in the 5 boroughs). Some of the New Pizzas On The Block (NPOTB if you will) are coming up and claiming that they too can sell you a full pie, no slices commoner!

Venturing through the old hood, I saw this place Chipp that was on Ocean and Z, right at my old bus stop. Naturally I had to go here. Inside, the place is gorgeous! Very clean, modern, and had a good looking interior. Let's not forget the brick oven. I wander in and gave the menu a once over and was impressed with what they had to offer - particularly this dessert pizza that featured a nice mix of fresh fruits, why more place do not do dessert pizza is beyond me. BE CREATIVE! Chipp gets points there. Where Chipp loses points is when I go to the counter and ask for a slice and the girl said, "we don't do that here." To which I replied, "I figured. That's too bad." She said, "get a pie, it's small. Maybe the size of two slices." I told her, "No thanks. It's a little pricey for two slices." Nearly $9 for the equivalent of two slices of pizza. This aint DiFara's and that's hardly worth it either.

Rating - N/A - I'd love to just say 0. Maybe I'll get here one day. Maybe not. Probably not. That's a lotta dough for 2 slices of pizza.

Their site - http://chippbrooklyn.com/

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Mel's Burger Bar

Mel's Burger Bar - Al Fresco

Oh the Upper West Side. Where do you really begin and end? I mean, by real standards and not real estate standards. I don't gauge the boundaries of this neighborhood by the insane costs of rent to live on top of people but more so on the rotten summer stank on the 1 train as you cruise up Broadway. I have a certain disdain for the waft of hot, dank air that blows into the air conditioned train cart at each passing stop and when you hit 96th, you know you're either ready to a) get off the train and just hoof it b) spray some type of deodorant to neutralize the funk in the air or c) put on a gas mask and enjoy the rest of the ride.

I had the recent pleasure of riding the 1 up to 110th to hit up Mel's, who offers a wide variety of burgers and shakes (Cookie Monster - ahem, Big Daddy's clone, PBJ, Smores, etc.), along with a handful of interesting starters (fried pickles, buffalo wings, brisket chili). The burger of choice for me was "The Original" because I kinda liked the nod on the menu that read "Thank You Louis." A nod to Louis Lunch over in New Haven that I thought warranted giving the burger a shot. For the record, I did not think it was going to replicate what LL has been doing for 115 years in any way other than slapping the burger sandwich on toast. A true LL fan like myself can also tell you that the obvious omission of the cheese spread left the sandwich lacking a little flavor (not just because they forgot my onion). Overall the burger was good. The girl was seemingly intent on giving me a medium burger, and I quote "is medium ok." To which I replied, nope. Gimme mine mooing and I'll take care of the rest.

Mel's Burger Bar - The Original

Overall the burger was good. The meat was really just meat. Black Angus? Who knows for sure. Could have been Angus MacGyver for all I know. It's a nice label but irrelevant in the scheme of things, especially if the meat lacks an overall flavor palate to make it stand out. My biggest complaint, if you can call it that, was the fact that the bread was a little too big for the burger. Not brutally big, but a little oversized. Did I enjoy this burger? Yes, I did. Was it a bit off? Yes it was.

Mel's Burger Bar Slogan - OK?

So what do we do? On the one hand, there's an extensive burger menu with some interesting and unique offering and on the other there's a lack of meat flavoring that makes the burger stand out assuming you were to eat it on a plate (but who really does that?) If you like well done fries, Mel's has exactly what you are looking for - twice fried, done nice and hard.

Rating - 3.5/5 - If ranking just my burger experience it would have been a little lower but I am giving a half point bump for the shakes (though I didn't try one they did intrigue me so I'll venture back, ideally in the Fall) and sides.

Their site - http://www.melsburgerbar.com/

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Brooklyn's Finest

Now That's Buffalo Chicken

Brooklyn this, Brooklyn that. Want the best sandwich? Go to Brooklyn. Want the best bagel? Go to Brooklyn. Want the best pizza? Go to Brooklyn. What to do when you're not in Brooklyn but want the best? Do not be tempted to go to the places that reference Brooklyn in their store name. It's not just a New York phenomenon because you can go to most any state to find New York style something, and sometimes more specifically, Brooklyn style.

Now that's not necessarily a bad thing. It's actually somewhat flattering and definitely a sound business plan. All that aside, there's a new contender for your pizza buying dollars on Staten Island and the theme is Brooklyn Dodgers based. The restaurant? Brooklyn's Finest. Why Brooklyn's Finest is on Staten Island is curious. Why there's no Richard Gere photos is beyond me too. The restaurant has sandwiches themed for the various neighborhoods of the best borough. BF is relatively new (opened April 2011) and is located really close to the Bridge but being so close to the bridge that separates SI and BK, you better be really good to want to entice me not to cross the bridge.

Grandma's Boy

The pizza offerings were vast, so vast that three needed to be sampled because I was my usual slovenly self and I was also feeling rather indecisive. That all being said, the buffalo chicken pizza really was an eye opener. This was like one of my most favoritest buffalo chicken pizzas ever. EVER! Two things made it great: 1) the buffalo chicken was actually spicy 2) the pizza dough was thick, no sauce (pizza sauce that is), and the perfect amount of cheese.

Hmmm. You look familiar.

The other sampled pieces were a grandma slice (good taste, GREAT sauce, but lacked the crunch at the bottom) and an L&B style square that delivered with the same great sauce, overall good flavor, but very thin in comparison. Thickness was about double that of the grandma square but still too thin to replicate the L&B square. Not that I am saying the goal was to replicate said square but they went through great lengths to make it look like that square.

Rating - 3.25/5 Lots of stuff to try and the specialty pies really seemed to be the way to go. There was cheesesteak, buffalo, marsala, ziti, etc. The buffalo was really good and I think the rest looked to be worthy of a second look.

Brooklyn's Finest is located at 1250 Hylan Blvd in the same shopping plaza as Bocelli's.

Their site - http://brooklynspizzany.com/

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Big Daddy's

Big Daddy's Menu

Big Daddy's, located on Columbus and 91st, is a retro themed diner that in my opinion is on the map for the Sweet Potater Tots. The retro theme is complimented with Trivial Pursuit cards on each table and a funky wallpaper that spans no specific generation, featuring logos/icons from the 60s, 70s, 80s, 90s, and 2000s. Sure they offer a handful of extra large burgers and a number of homemade shakes as well but since Napoleon Dynamite made tots all the rage, they're a menu must. Making sweet potatoes into tots is just taking things up a few notches and that's something that needs to be recognized.

Big Mac Daddy

In eateries that serve sweet potato fries, I'm one to ask for maple syrup to dip them in. Sometimes that will result in some odd looks for the wait staff but I'm very used to odd looks. Big Daddy's, however, serves their Sweet Potater Tots with a homemade, over the top, spicy and not sweet at all BBQ sauce for dipping and it is NOT a good pairing for me. The sauce is strong and not complimentary to the sweetness of the sweet potatoes and that's just a mistake. For a look at their menu, click here.

Half Eaten Big Mac Daddy

The big burgers, are cooked to order from fresh meat and served with tots. Be warned!! Do not ask to sub in the Sweet Potater Tots for regular tots because Big Daddy will draw the line and you'll be put in your place. I've been told "We can't do that." In the food service business, focus on the word service, there's no such thing as can't. Want the sweet tots? Spend an extra $6. I was seething at this one because it's just absurd. The last thing I need is tots and more tots to go with my burger. I sorta worry about my waistline sometimes and I think I should pay some attention to my cholesterol so getting more fried treats, no matter if they're trans-fat free or not, seems like a not so hot idea. Add that to the fact that it's nice 'n' greasy for my complexion and we've got a winning combo.

Infamous Sweet Potater Tots

But you are saying, this is a burger site, where's the burger review? Here it is. I recently visited and ordered the Big Mac Daddy burger - their take on the Big Mac minus one patty and one slice of bread while adding caramelized onions. The burger holds up really well and has nice flavor, with or without all the added toppings. The bun is a good size to hold the large slab of beef piled on top of it while soaking up the burger's juices nicely.

Rating - 3.75/5 - No subbing sweet potater tots with a $15 burger and forcing the customer to spend an extra $8 on this signature item? Foolish. The burger is good and a bit on the high side. At $15 (not including a drink, sides, etc.) you are creeping in on Olde Homestead or Minetta Tavern territory and this is not on the level with those. It's a good burger, not the best burger but the no subbing really does rub me the wrong way.

Their site - http://www.bigdaddysnyc.com/

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The Square

The Square

Square Sign on Hylan Blvd

Someone once said imitation is the sincerest form of flattery. What took someone over 60 years to imitate the magic created at L&B Spumoni Gardens is beyond my comprehension. 

I was recently told that I "had to try" this because it's as "good as L&B." That's a VERY lofty statement in my world because L&B serves up the only Sicilian I willingly eat and I think that has to count for something. L&B also is the home of the triple parked car, the outrageously long lines, and can serve all the slices in a square pie (24 in total) in about 2 minutes on a slow day. But this is not about L&B, this is about the Square and how it measures up.

Square with Menu

At left is a pic of the menu and the overhead shot of the Square. My first impression was "Wow! They look like they really nailed it." Then I bit into it and those thoughts vanished. Sure the texture is similar with the cheese having been melted directly into the dough, hidden beneath a layer of thick, sweet sauce. The similarity between the imitator and the originator end there. The dough seemed dry and overdone compared to what L&B serves (I should know, I was there an hour later). The crunch on the bottom was a little extra crunchy compared to L&B and I actually liked the extra crunch. I did not like the dryness of the rest of the dough and the sauce, while sweet, was spread rather thinly and lacked other flavor beyond parmesan cheese.

Square - Side Angle - So thin...

The Square also serves a slightly smaller piece than that of L&B but the size difference is marginal when you consider the $13 toll on the Verrazano Bridge. In the pic at right, you might be able to note the relative dryness in the dough, especially towards the left side of the piece (the right side has extra e.v.o.o. seeping into the dough. The Square is a decent alternative when taking the Bridge toll into consideration but to compare the two, there's ultimately no comparison. L&B was imitated and not duplicated by this small pizzeria with a very unassuming store front right off of Hylan Boulevard, ironically within 5 minutes of the aforementioned Bridge.

Rating - 2.75/5 - Maybe it was a bad day for the Square? Maybe eating there at lunch time  was not a good idea? Maybe the sauce needs a little work? Maybe I'm just a huge L&B fanboy but I'd welcome any pizzeria to make Squares the L&B way because it just tastes better. This is good but not great and I'd say if you are on SI, this is worth a look.


**Editor's Note - rating is based on the Square experience alone and the resulting score has nothing to do with the Pizza served at L&B. References to L&B are strictly made because of the obvious comparison.

Their site - Cannot find one as of 8/26/11

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Blue 9

I should have been scared.

Let's start by taking you back to a time when I was on one of my typical eatercising quests. This time was roughly 5 years ago and I was in the midst of trying out some "must have" food in NYC. I'm not going to put any other spots on blast here but I say this NY, it's not that you can't get a good cheesesteak in NYC but if you are telling me it's just like the Philly experience and you do not deliver, shame, shame, shame. It's not "let's call Arnold Diaz" type shame but it's not good and I'd rather make a run down to Philly. On a night like that, after a cheesesteak letdown, I needed a burger pick me up. Blue 9 was close and I had heard good things so it seemed like a good fit. Until I ate it.

Fast forward to the present day and I was doing some wandering up and down 9th avenue - one of the BEST places to wander if you are not in the village IMO - and there was another Blue 9. Sure this was not the same one that jaded my opinion of their small chain but at some point, a chain is a chain because they do it all the same. If not, what's the point. The only thing that varies, is the amount of love the cook has for the food. If the cook wants your burger experience to be the best burger experience, chain or not, they can and will wow you. Trust me on this, I had Taco Bell late last night and it wowed me. Sure I was famished but I was also shocked that the food presented nicely and was neatly packaged in the tortilla.

So Blue 9 2.0, here's to you. I walk in the Hell's Kitchen location, door wide open, place empty, two guys behind the counter seemingly confused as to why I am there. I ask, "you are still open correct?" The hesitant "yes" should have told me to go home and eat some Chobani but I was here so why not? I ask for a Blue 9 Burger  (double burger, cheese, lettuce, tomato, thousand island) As the pic shows you, raw onion got on there too, NBD since I like it but why the wilted lettuce? I say that is not necessary. The burger itself is actually not bad. The picture you see is a double and each bite does provide enough beef. It also has enough similar qualities to a number of other burger places that sell shakes in NYC however if you like you burger served with a side of apathy and heaping loads of indifference on top, then you might love Blue 9.

Blue 9 Menu with FLASHY flash!

Rating - 2/5 - This has been a middle the road burger for me for a long time. I took a 5 year hiatus and they're still there, mediocrity, minus half a point for wilted lettuce and indifference. It's nothing spectacular though I've noticed the burger menu has morphed a bit to feature some more exotic pairings - mango came to mind at the Hell's Kitchen spot. Similar experiences, different locations, years apart. Who really goes here? And why?

Their site - www.blue9burger.com

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Brennan and Carr

A Brooklyn Classic...
There are huge rivalries all around NYC, typically dealing with sports teams and there are very few that sit on the fence and root for both. It's one or the other. You like the Yankees and hate the Mets. You like the Giants and hate the Jets. You could care less about the Knicks but you still hate the Nets. Rivalries truly do make the things we enjoy that much more enjoyable because we want our favorite to be the best. There are two sandwich giants in BK, most famous for the roast beef offerings, and many people are loyal to either Brennan and Carr or Roll N Roaster (featured here)

As a kid I did what you call the Brooklyn shuffle, moving five times over a span of seven years while being fortunate enough to remain in the same general area. During my most formative years (read rapid growth) I had the luxury of living 4 blocks from Roll N Roaster yet had to take a bus that transferred right in front of Brennan and Carr**

Brothy Goodness

What's a boy to do? I mean, everyone had their favorite and I honestly could not choose. This was not some Mets-Yankees scenario unfolding, this was food. Great food. And great food is one thing I never deprive myself of, in case you hadn't noticed. Since I'm not comparing who has the better roast beef sandwich (I'll save that for another day) I have to go based on burgers. In the burger fight, however,  B&C doesn't quite play fair.

Hard to tell how soaked the bun is.

YES, you can buy their beef burger and be fairly satisfied at their offering OR you can play it smart and order the Gargiulo Burger, have the pour beef broth on it and know that they just did to burgers what should have been done a LONG time ago. The Gargiulo is listed there on the menu and if you don't know and don't ask what it is, you're missing out. But now, you're armed with knowledge that you need to get this burger (NOT cooked to order) topped with delicious, hot roast beef, cheese (optional) and then the bun is smothered in broth. Let it sit a while and have some fun poking the bun to watch broth seep out. This is a heavenly sandwich. It's pricy too but nobody said heaven would be cheap.

I'm a burger with roast beef on top

Rating - 4.5/5 - This is just such an impressive burger/sandwich. Yes it's kinda cheating to add it here but NYC is loaded w/specialty burgers and this is one of the best.

**Editor's Note - While I did take the B3 to the B36 when I knew a sandwich from B&C was in order, there was an "easier" way to get home via the B49 and I tell you this in an effort of full disclosure.

Their site - http://brennanandcarr.kpsearch.com/df/default.asp

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